Even the thought of trying to explain my KP to a potential girlfriend scares the **** outta me. I don't know if I will ever be able to do it. I'm not currently dating anyone, but I have the oppontunity if I really wanted to. But if I cant get past my KP, how can I ask someone else to??

hmmm thats a good one..i could never tell anyone about mine..ive been single for awhile because i cant except it and most of my "boyfriends" want perfect girls so im screwed there..but..you will eventually have to tell that person..i mean its gonna be a hard thing to overcome but that person will just have to learn to live with it and learn to like you for you..with or without flaws..thats just me though...

As a 29-year old woman, I can tell you that if I truly loved someone, the texture and feel of their skin would not bother me much. If it it does bother YOU however, then perhaps you can be intimate with clothes on for a while . . . and even longer. You are lucky in being male in that girls are much less focused on exteriors than men.
Think about it- we women have to touch very scratchy itchy faces due to male facial hair and some women will even comment that they like it!

You're lucky being a guy with KP...you can easily cover it up and it won't be as noticeable if you have hairy arms. But being female...it's hard not enjoying sleevless tops or bikinis. If you're worried about KP, you could try and find a girl who has it too. After all 40% of the population has it (and 50-80% of adolescents..although I feel like i'm the only teen with it!)

I find that is a very hard thing for me too, in relationships. (I am a female). It seems like it is so hard to take that first step, because I have a lot of scars from kp, on my arms as well as on my chest and back, and it is hard for me to think about someone else looking at them.

But what it really comes down to is trust, and love. If the other person loves you then nancyk is right - the texture of your skin won't matter. My boyfriend knows that I don't like the way my skin looks, and that I am working to make it better (very hard and frustrating, as you all know!), and he is also amazed that I know so much about the condition (thanks to these boards ). He goes out of his way to tell me when my skin is looking better, and he always tells me that I am beautiful. He helps me to believe that I am.

And we are all beautiful. Don't let someone who can't see past your kp bring you down. We all deserve to be loved by people who are not that superficial.

My KP has never held me back. I'm a female. I have KP all over my legs, butt, arms. I can feel a few KP on other parts of my body like my back, stomach. Every now and then I'll have a couple pop up on my chest and face, but I'll usually get them under my jaw. I also know that I am a very good looking woman and truthfully I think my KP has kept me humble. Could never be too full of myself. I've had many people tell me that I'm a beautiful woman and don't even know it. I do know, but I also know I have some ugly ass red bumps on my body and that keeps me grounded. There is more to life than looks.

My skin has always been this way so if there was anything that made me really feel self concious it would be a zit or weight gain. I can see where it would bother someone if they just flared up with it or they had a bad case on their face. My heart goes out to ya'll.

Frankly, you don't have to bring up your KP. Its not like you got an STD. If a person really likes you they will see past the bumps. I've dated a lot of guys and my KP was never an issue. Sure, I'm sure my skin would have felt a lot nicer to them had it been smooth, but its not. My cousin wore jeans all the time because she had it on her legs. **** on that. Its too hot in the South to suffer. Let people look...be comfortable. If anything I have been able to inform people what it is. I can't tell you how many people I have bumped into who have KP and they didn't know what was wrong with their skin.

Just last year I saw my husband's cousin. I noticed her arms had bumps on them and I gently rubbed her arm and said, "You have bumps like me." At first she looked down and seemed self-concious, but then I showed her my arm. Hugest smile spread on her face. Her mom had the same problem. She used some kind of lotion years ago and can't remember the name of it, but it got rid of her bumps and her skin is smooth as smooth can be. Every now and then she will see one bump and thats it.

I had this one boyfriend years ago who was so good looking. One night I noticed something hard and rough on his leg and I asked what it was. He had psorasis. He always gets a patch of it on his legs. I could tell he was getting guarded about it and I told him, "Yeah, I've got a skin problem, too." I ran his hand on my arm and told him what it was. I said, "My skin doesn't shed around the hair folicles and so it makes these little bumps." Hugest grin from him. We had something to share that bonded us.

I'm telling ya'll don't let the KP rule what your feel about yourself. You will probably find out that the person your seeing has some sort of skin problem they can relate to. And if they don't they probably have someone close to them that does.

And another thing. KP can be protective in a sense. If someone is that superficial about your bumps than you don't need them in your life. I surely wouldn't want to be with someone who is so judgemental.

This was a wonderful post, thank you. I especially agree with the part quoted above. I think that it is the same thing for me, and probably for a lot of us here. We know we are beautiful, but at the same time we constantly keep our bodies and the marks/bumps a secret.. Which makes it that much more special when we let someone close to us. And by then we know that they don't value us for perfect looks alone. Perhaps kp could be looked at as some kind of blessing in disguise..

The girls I have noticed who have KP are pretty open about it. I never see them cover up. But then again, they are both in relationships already.

I totally agree with what you are saying. But I'm talking about just DATING. I'm no where near love right now...hahaha!

I need help with that first baby step.

I relate to you about staying humble and I can appreciate that in myself.

I live in Southern California, so I know what you mean about it being too hot out to be all covered up. But that "letting people look" part is the hardest for me. I cant get over that, so thats why I always cover up when I go out.

I cant tell you how good that would make me feel if a girl did that for me. You are a really good person to do that. That makes someone who is self-conscious about themselves feel so much better.

as hard as it is to deal with the KP, i think it would be even harder to try to be intimate with clothes on all the time. kinda defeats the purpose

What?! are you serious?! women are the ones buying all the fancy clothes and makeup/hair/nails!

we will have to disagree on that subject.

Lonewolf, I don't know what part of California you live in, but I do know that places like San Diego, Los Angeles, etc., have a majority of shallow people there. I'm not saying everyone is, but its almost ingrained in the culture. So if you are living in an area like that then now I see why you are so self-concious. You may seriously want to look into moving. Or you can make peace with yourself and be above the shallowness that surrounds you.

Let people know you. Open yourself up so you can connect with other humans. When you can allow that then you are letting people in on the inner you which has a whole lot more to offer. Everyone has flaws. Everyone. But, that's what makes us all unique and special.

I think Nancy means that women are more inclined to make themselves up and worry about the softness of their skin. But, when they are looking for a male mate they are not worried if he has a soft face. Men can get away with being rough and gruff because that's a turn on for most women. Unless they like metrosexuals. I do love a man that takes care of himself, but I don't think I could go for someone who primps more than me.

hey everybody !! i'm sooo glad i found this website. i'm a black women (29yrs old) and just discovered i had "kb". all my life i thought they were hairbumps. i too have been so insecure about my kb problem. its like i desire to be something my body will not allow. i imagine my self in short skirts, nice shorts and sexy dresses so i can show my legs but i can not allow my self to do it. i dressed in shorts one time and one guy told me my legs were ugly and i've been insecure since then. although one guy i dated it didnt matter. deep down i feel like i'm still single because of my "kb" problem. I really do not consider myself to have a low self esteem its just only when it comes to my kb problem. its like I'm comfortable dating in the winter but shy away in the summer and i'm getting tired of that . can anyone relate ?